Day Care #1

We went to visit our first San Francisco Day Care today, and I fear I have been Midwesternized. The philosophy at this lovely top-of-the-line institution is pretty darn...tolerant for my taste.

Instead of traditional rules, the children are encouraged to take the initiative to resolve their own conflicts. When trouble kicks up in the play-yard: mutual toy-lust, taking-turn anxiety, even pushing-- the kids sit down with their teachers to talk through their feelings and discuss how to cope. I get it-- creative problem solving and all that. But what about boundaries and personal space, and right and wrong? I want my child to know the rules. If she chooses to bend or break them later in life, so be it. But I want her to know that it is not okay to push, and it is advisable to share, and that two year olds lack the necessary judgment to run their own lives.

Another rule-- teachers don't ask questions that have a right or wrong answer. The fear is that a child could feel bad about himself because he got something incorrect. Or worse, he will hit on the right answer and then worry about whether or not he can repeat the feat tomorrow. Okay, again, I get it. Except that when it comes to certain things-- order of the alphabet, say, or days of the week, there is a right and a wrong answer. Failure is all part of learning how to identify success. Right?

Oh god. I'm going to be a Bay Area Mommy Reject.