Beer

Last weekend we squeezed 14 people into the Indiana Lake Cabin. There were bodies piled on air mattresses, in hammocks and in a tent outside-- and all those bodies seemed regular enough in the twilight. But when we woke up to 90-degree weather, the bikini tops went on, the men’s t-shirts went off and Rooster and I looked at each other in horror. How was it that so many apparently decent and normal human beings had such fabulous flat stomachs?

Decked out in our sun hats, plus oversized swim trunks for Rooster and one of those cute little skirt swim suits for me, we scurried over the closest sand dune to discuss. Unfortunately, the closest sand dune leads to a beach and on the beach there were volleyball nets and teenagers, their pert little buns bobbing eagerly under string tied spandex. We walked our pasty white selves across the smoking hot sand and, as we passed overweight mother after mother in cute little skirt swim suits, I decided that perhaps it was time to put a pair of shorts on, flaunt my latest chicken-logo T-shirt and fire up the grill. Because if you can’t blend with them, at least you can try and bring them to your level.

THE NATIONAL BEER WHOLESALERS ASSOCIATION "COOKING WITH BEER CHALLENGE"

The Rules: Send in an original recipe featuring any

style of beer (e.g. pilsner, stout, porter, lager, fruit lambic, ale, etc.). Recipe may be for any type of dish: appetizer, soup, baked good, entrée, etc., and may utilize any standard cooking or preparation method. Recipe should be for 4 to 10 servings. Judging of the recipes will be based on Taste (40%); Utilization of Beer (25%); Simplicity (10%), Appearance (10%) and Overall Appeal (15%).

The Prize: The grand prize winner will receive a seven day trip for two to the Golden Crown Paradise Resort and Spa in Cancun Mexico, airfare and transfers included, plus $500 in spending money. The second place prize winner will receive $1,000 in cash.

The Entry: Negra Modelo Burgers with Grilled Onion and Avocado (inspired by Ms. Sassy's Sister-in-Law, Regina)

1/2 cup Negra Modelo
1 tablespoon unsweetened cocoa powder.
1/8 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1/2 teaspoon granulated garlic
1 teaspoon brown sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
2 pounds ground sirloin
2 red onions, sliced in thick rings
6 slices Pepper Jack cheese
6 hamburger buns
2 avocados, sliced

In a small mixing bowl, stir together Stout, cocoa powder, cinnamon, cumin, granulated garlic, brown sugar and salt. Put ground sirloin in a large mixing bowl and pour beer mixture over it, stirring gently until combined. Handling meat as little as possible (but still packing firm), form into six patties.

Prepare a medium-hot fire in a charcoal grill or preheat a gas grill to medium-high. Brush the hot grill rack with vegetable oil. Place the patties and onion rings on the rack leaving room to flip (or cook onions first and flip carefully once they blacken around the edges, about 4 minutes per side). Cook burgers 5 to 7 minutes on each side for medium. During the final minutes of cooking the burgers, top each with a slice of pepper jack cheese and add buns to the grill, toasting just until golden. To assemble, place burgers on grilled buns and top with grilled onion, avocado and your favorite condiments.